One day I decided I had to be free to do my own thing. I needed to learn how to be me. I went on a mission to discover what that could be. This is my journey and this is how I became an explorer.

I’m the person who dreams of going out into the forrest and never come back. But I will never do that because I have a family, a house and a Volvo. I’m not the misfit who does a thing like that, right? 

In the beginning I was like most good girls. I behaved the way I was supposed to which didn’t really mean exploring freely, but under a preset curriculum. And by doing so I checked out of school with good grades and a number of years later from the university with a masters degree in computer engineering.

I did this to get a really good job that would provide me with all the opportunities one could wish for. Problem was I really didn’t wish for the opportunities an engineer could have working for big companies. But for more than ten years I thought I did.

My job was such a big part of my life and my identity. I was good at it, so how could it make me so unhappy, unfulfilled and frankly bored to tears?

During these years I went out in the forrest many times. Mostly on lunch hours. I set out on short discoveries close to my workplace. I literaly needed to ’run away’, at least for a few minutes to be able to deal with the rest of the day.

It took me many hours of walking to figure out it wasn’t anything wrong with the company, my collegues, customers or even the management. I had to conclude there was something wrong with me.

This is when my real journey began. I didn’t know where this path would take me or how it would change me. I just needed to do it. I had to find out what I could work with that didn’t make me unhappy.

I created a new career for me that wasn’t coloured by my upbringing and others expectations of what a proper job was. I became a journalist and I wanted to be a freelancer to have the freedom to be selfemployed.

As a freelancing journalist I lived off my own creativity. I wrote articles based on my ideas of what is going on in the world right now, filtered through the lens of my customers topics of interest. This made me and my freedom loving heart and mind happy.

But things happened in my life. When is it ever perfect?

A snake lured its way into Paradise (yes, I’m a bit vague here for privacy reasons) and activated my dream of disappearing into the forrest again. But I can’t do that can I?

Sometimes when you are fronted with a life crisis you are able to turn things upside down in a way that doesn’t seem possible otherwise. I had this idea of starting a podcast and it would be about archives, repositories of human knowledge or at least remains of it.

This was a crazy idea for me. I had no background in history, culture, archeology or such and I had never worked with radio. But I knew I had to do this, so I set out on a new journey to explore this idea.

Photo credit: AnnaCarin Isaksson